Once upon a time in Iraq, a man married a young woman from a village nearby, while his sister married the woman's brother. Each couple made their home in the village of the husband.
It was the best of times in the first village, where the bride bore her husband three sons in quick succession.
It was the worst of times a few miles away, where her childless sister-in-law became an object of scorn. Unable to bear the increasing weight of social stigma in her new home, the barren bride threw herself in the well and drowned.
The people of her home village were outraged by the treatment she received, and set out bent on vengeance.
Wiser heads interceded before blood was shed. Respected elders met and proposed an
Atwa (arrangement). The dead woman's family was to receive $20,000, and the villages would avoid contact for 20 years. If peace was maintained, this monetary bond would then be returned in a symbolic act of complete reconciliation.
The terms were accepted, peace was maintained, $20,000 was returned, and normal relations were restored.
Middle Eastern communities have used this dispute resolution mechanism for centuries. The Atwa gives both sides a chance to demonstrate honor by adhering to a prescribed set of interim duties. Meanwhile, the honor-bound obligations of reprisal and counter-reprisal are honorably set aside while emotions cool and memories fade.
In 1990, when Saddam Hussein invaded Kuwait, the Arab League asked for time to negotiate an Atwa. George Bush I refused, and Gulf War I began.
Again in 2003, the Arabs asked for time to deal with charges that Saddam had WMD. George Bush II refused, and this disastrous war began.
After thousands dead and thousands wounded, the Out of Iraq Caucus no longer meets in a phone booth. Leading Democrats (and a few Republicans) who backed the war now admit they were wrong. Armed Services champion Jack Murtha (D-PA) says "continued military action is not in the best interests of the United States of America, the Iraqi people or the Persian Gulf Region".
So, what can be done to extract our troops from this disaster caused by Bush and his neo-con advisors?
A few of my colleagues still hope for turning points and positive outcomes. Many others fear wider conflict after we leave. US force can never bring order to this chaos.
Can Iraq embrace and enforce an arrangement of its own, true to Iraqi tradition and culture?
Much of Iraq's upper crust dispatched their extended families to Jordan to wait out the troubles in relative safety -- perhaps a million refugees in all. In August I spent three days in Amman, where a high-ranking official related his Tale of Two Villages. He took part in the Atwa conference described above, and returned 20 years later to celebrate the rituals of reunion.
As a postscript, he was invited to a wedding feast when one of the fertile woman's sons took a bride from the other village!
Iraqi exiles and their Arab neighbors tell me an Atwa is possible. First, announce a rapid US withdrawal. Simultaneously, announce an Atwa conference. Interested parties would meet in Amman, Paris or elsewhere to acknowledge grievances and develop a durable "interim" exchange of obligations. (Westerners think in terms of treaties and signatures, but Arab honor is satisfied by the word of parties given to a set of actions incumbent on both sides.)
People object by saying, "Civil war will break out. Things will get worse." This assumes that Iraqis will continue killing one another with an Atwa conference in progress.
Why not assume that Iraqis value their own honor, love their families and prefer to live in Peace?
Maybe, just maybe, a ceasefire would hold.